When I was (much) younger and dating, my Momma would give me advice. One of the pieces of advice that stuck with me was, “This is as good as it gets”. In other words, what you see now in the person you’re dating is the best they have to offer. People who are dating put their best foot forward. You’re not able to see the other ‘foot’ until, many times, it’s too late. Things get serious. Marriage follows. Then Heartbreak. And often kids are involved.
Many of you know I travel a bit. I was in a small town and stopped in an ice cream shop to get my favorite dipped cone. The teenage girl behind the counter was clearly stricken with the teenage boy who was working with her. As they were flirting back and forth – and I was waiting for my ice cream cone – I watched their interaction. He thought he would impress her by being surly and abrupt – you know, the bad boy act. While she chided him for his behavior, she was giggling like only an infatuated teenage girl can. As he continued to smirk, I watched him make the cone and hand it to her. As she passed it to me, I said, “This is as good as it gets”. She gave me a puzzled look. I motioned to him and repeated, “This is as good as it gets. He’s on his best behavior. It only goes downhill from here.”
Marriage is hard enough without starting at a disadvantage. I’ve watched people fool themselves into thinking
- I can ‘fix’ him/her.
- He will settle down.
- She will become more loving.
- He’ll never treat ME like that.
- Love is all that matters.
- I can make his family love me.
- She’s nothing like her family.
When I was (much) younger and dating, my Momma would give me advice. One of the pieces of advice that stuck with me was, “This is as good as it gets”
My Momma taught me to be wise and to actually see the person I was dating for who they were. Fortunately, I made good choices and dated some good guys – though the alternatives were there. I just wasn’t interested because of What Momma Said.
That teenage girl in the ice cream shop may not have had a Momma like mine. I hope she was able to hear my Momma through me. That’s why I do what I do. Sharing with others the wisdom my Momma taught me and what I’ve learned along the way.
Looking for a speaker? Someone who can share life lessons with humor? Call or email me. Kathy@YouKnowWhatMommaSaid.com
